The roommate describes herself as "a clean freak". In practice what this means is: I clean everything, then I leave (my) Swiffer pointedly out in the hallway, and she equally pointedly puts it back in the broom closet. Also she keeps folding Her Majesty's blanky, which is dumb because a) if Her Majesty liked her blanky folded, I would obviously keep it folded for her and b) Her Majesty pisses on the blanky, so you don't want to touch it, really.

Anyway. Today, New Roommate is moving in, so the incumbent roommate decided to do some cleaning. GASP!! We should get a new roommate every week, then I wouldn't have to do all the chores.

Ok. So first, the roommate used the last Swiffer dry cloth. And threw it out. And left the empty box in the broom closet. Now there are no Swiffer dry cloths. Then, she used a wet cloth, and left the wet cloth box open (so they'll dry out) and resting at an angle in the basket on the back of the closet door (so it leaked all over me when I opened said door).

All this wouldn't be so bad if she had at least made the effort to scrub off the Nutella stains her son left all over the kitchen floor...

Donna: So now your wet Swiffer cloths are your new dry cloths!

Me: Maybe she planned it that way. Cause, you know, she's good at planning.