I return from work after being gone almost the exact hours that I normally spend sleeping. This should work just fine, I think to myself. I walk the dog, eat breakfast, get into bed for a well-deserved... The dog wet the bed. Ah, fuck. It's not that she can't go overnight, so either a) she had a seizure or my personal favourite b) she did it out of pique.

I'm not amused right now.