Things that were discussed at Easter dinner with Lutheran friends:
- the new pope
- the Berlin wall
- why pre-dawn Easter service is a great idea
- mice infestations
- rat infestations
- squirrel infestations
- raccoon infestations
- things to buy for your estate sale
- difference between yard sale and estate sale
- brain aneurysms
- CP hotels
- the mystery of the non-robotic garbage trucks
- how excellent municipal services are
- more mice infestations
- the difference between house mice, deer mice and field mice
- voles
- Mennonites
- the difficulty of scheduling all the things you have to go to (it's not just me)
- food safety
- l'Académie française
- appropriate attire for dancing salsa
- also, mice
Like I said, we Lutherans are so fun-loving.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Sitting in church with my sister Melanie who is a voice teacher and apparently found out I sing by listening to me during the service. An announcement is made regarding the spring social and talent show. Melanie looks at me pointedly. Me: "don't look at me pointedly." Melanie: "are you gonna?" Me: "let's do a duet." Melanie: "Ok."
Hmmmmmmmmmm...
Hmmmmmmmmmm...
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Now I have to go to bed. Shortly thereafter, get up again. Walk two dogs (not together, they're not a good pair). Go to church. Go home. Walk two dogs. Sit. Walk two dogs. Go to Easter dinner with family from church. Go home. Walk two dogs. Go to bed. Get up. Walk... one dog. Why is my life such a rapid succession of getting up and going to bed with all this dog-walking in between? Why is there no rest? Why is the sea boiling hot? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh!
Friday, March 29, 2013
Landlady (via email): Can you look after my dog this weekend?
Me: Sure.
Landlady (via email): Thanks, I'll drop her off Friday evening.
Me (to roommates): Yo roommates, landlady's dog is gonna stay here on the weekend.
Male Roommate: Who said yes to that?
Downstairs Roommate: Are YOU looking after her?
Hmmmmm... Did I get myself into something?
Me: Sure.
Landlady (via email): Thanks, I'll drop her off Friday evening.
Me (to roommates): Yo roommates, landlady's dog is gonna stay here on the weekend.
Male Roommate: Who said yes to that?
Downstairs Roommate: Are YOU looking after her?
Hmmmmm... Did I get myself into something?
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Roommate ties dog outside. I go walk my dog. I come back; other dog follows us in. Roommate swears at him and puts him back outside. I change into my bathrobe and go to have a shower; bathroom door refuses to open. ? Light is off... bathroom door should open. Try again? No. But why is the door locked from inside and the light off? I turn light on. Male Roommate's dejected voice from inside: "thank you." WTF? Bitch turned the light off on him while he's taking a dump? I go back to my room. Male Roommate exits bathroom. I go have a shower. On my way to bathroom I hear the dog crying outside. Me: "Female Roommate, your dog is crying to come in." Her: "I know." I shower. I turn shower off. The dog is STILL crying outside. Lucky for her the girl went to let him in before I was done putting on my robe to go give her what for. I tells ya, my bitch-slapping hand itches every time I see her.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Sitting in bed quietly studying. Computer turned off. Just gonna study for a while and then get a good night sleep so I can study tomorrow.
Brain: "You know how in your music book, the words for Voices of Spring are in English and Italian? And your voice teacher doesn't like your pronunciation in English OR Italian?"
Me: "And?"
Brain: "Everything else Strauss wrote is in German. It must have German words."
Me: "Brain, you're a genius. I'll look for the German version first thing tomorrow."
Brain: "You'll have forgotten by first thing tomorrow. You're getting very forgetful."
Me: "You're right. I'd better do it right away. Won't take but two minutes and then back to studying."
Brain: "Exactly."
Me: "It's so nice when we co-operate."
An hour of reading memes later... Brain: "Sucker!"
Scumbag Brain...
Brain: "You know how in your music book, the words for Voices of Spring are in English and Italian? And your voice teacher doesn't like your pronunciation in English OR Italian?"
Me: "And?"
Brain: "Everything else Strauss wrote is in German. It must have German words."
Me: "Brain, you're a genius. I'll look for the German version first thing tomorrow."
Brain: "You'll have forgotten by first thing tomorrow. You're getting very forgetful."
Me: "You're right. I'd better do it right away. Won't take but two minutes and then back to studying."
Brain: "Exactly."
Me: "It's so nice when we co-operate."
An hour of reading memes later... Brain: "Sucker!"
Scumbag Brain...
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Hay River: flood prediction is done by an old guy and anyone on Town Council who answers the phone when the paper calls them. Winnipeg: flood prediction is done by Actual Scientists using Actual Data and Actual Math. What a wonderful world.
Tiffany: University of Alberta actually does the predictions here in HR
Me: I hesitate to contradict the SAO's wife on this topic but last time I talked to the UofA team they had no ability to make meaningful predictions due to the stochastic nature of the problem. Most of the predictions came from the late Red McBryan and big-mouthed councilors such as Kevin Wallington.
Tiffany: ...lol Ya, inter office used UofA data to 'try' to predict it.
Me: I think part of the problem is that not enough people know what "stochastic" means.
Tiffany: University of Alberta actually does the predictions here in HR
Me: I hesitate to contradict the SAO's wife on this topic but last time I talked to the UofA team they had no ability to make meaningful predictions due to the stochastic nature of the problem. Most of the predictions came from the late Red McBryan and big-mouthed councilors such as Kevin Wallington.
Tiffany: ...lol Ya, inter office used UofA data to 'try' to predict it.
Me: I think part of the problem is that not enough people know what "stochastic" means.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Perfectly by chance, I happened to see a photo of my dog lying in the garden in October when it was half taken apart and she had managed to save her little spot that she loved. I think I might cry. I'm sorry I gave up your garden, little mutt. And I'm sorry there isn't a garden here like I thought there would. I'll make you a garden again somehow.
Another thing that's a whole new experience in Winnipeg is that the local news providers talk about things OTHER THAN the local news. I see a headline from Winnipeg Free Press saying "magnitude 6.2 earthquake hits" and I'm like "WHAT? I never even felt it!" And then I read the rest of the line: "in Guatemala." Ooooooooooh... Well sorry if I never saw a non-local headline on a newspaper in the last nine years...
Winnipeg, day 55: finally got around to cutting open the giant box I can't get from the car into the house because I packed all my textbooks and sheet music in it and it weighs a ton. And hey, all my socks are in it! I'm so glad to see you, socks.
Also, I finally figured out how Portage, Main, Graham and Vaughan connect and which buses run on them. So far, Monday has been remarkably successful.
Also, I finally figured out how Portage, Main, Graham and Vaughan connect and which buses run on them. So far, Monday has been remarkably successful.
What I did on the weekend
I attended the Manitoba Orchid Society's annual show. Also St. John Passion performed by Canzona, but that wasn't as much of a photo thing.
This summer I'm gonna join the Manitoba Orchid Society and go on field trips with them to look at orchids. It's this thing people do in the south where they get together to enjoy a common interest, not just to talk about themselves. You jealous, Hay River?
This summer I'm gonna join the Manitoba Orchid Society and go on field trips with them to look at orchids. It's this thing people do in the south where they get together to enjoy a common interest, not just to talk about themselves. You jealous, Hay River?
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (also known as "when I lived in Hay River"), I was working on two repertoire pieces: Rejoice Greatly from Messiah and Alleluia from Exsultate Jubilate. But then I got too busy with packing, and then I started voice lessons and I only did what my teacher told me to do for the last six weeks. But I'm out of sorts and my voice is shot because of the thaw and it took forever to warm it up to singing shape at practice, and when I looked at this sappy, EASY stuff she makes me sing, I was like... sigh. Do not want. So then I decided to be a rebel and sing something awesome. Such as Rejoice Greatly, which I hadn't touched in at least three months. And... it was AWESOME! If I'd had a recording of this time and the last time I sang it, I don't think you'd have known it was the same singer. I can do it, and I can do it at speed, and I can do it awesome. And I've had five half-hour lessons. That's IT. I'm so underpaying my teacher, it's ridiculous.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Me, trying to remember my grocery list as I walk into Safeway after church: Milk, bread...
The Brain: Lemonade!
Me: Hush, Brain. I'm trying to think. Milk, bread...
The Brain: Lemonade!
Me: That's not even how it goes!!
The Brain: Oh. Right. :(
Me, arriving at the till with way more than I meant to buy because Safeway is full of delicious and affordable food, as usual: Hmmmm... Seriously, do I need to buy all this?
The Brain: Yes you do. Also, you forgot the lemonade.
Sigh... If I die of a brain aneurysm you'll know The Brain won.
The Brain: Lemonade!
Me: Hush, Brain. I'm trying to think. Milk, bread...
The Brain: Lemonade!
Me: That's not even how it goes!!
The Brain: Oh. Right. :(
Me, arriving at the till with way more than I meant to buy because Safeway is full of delicious and affordable food, as usual: Hmmmm... Seriously, do I need to buy all this?
The Brain: Yes you do. Also, you forgot the lemonade.
Sigh... If I die of a brain aneurysm you'll know The Brain won.
Don't feel like getting dressed and taking the bus to church... I need to move into a convent so I can just throw a habit over my pjs in the morning and stagger down the hall to church.
(Later.) When you think about it though, I think when you live in a convent you're not allowed to badmouth your roommates on Facebook all day. You win some, you lose some.
(Later.) When you think about it though, I think when you live in a convent you're not allowed to badmouth your roommates on Facebook all day. You win some, you lose some.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
There is a "new student registration" form for the Winnipeg School Division, signed by Female Roommate's father, on the kitchen table. Dated yesterday. Ok, I guess she wasn't in school because she wasn't signed up for school because she was previously living with her mother in Ontario... eight months ago. Maybe sometimes when I judge people's parenting by their children's behaviour, I'm not really that far off.
(Later.) Corollary: sounds like she's in a real pissy mood again. YES!!
(Later.) Corollary: sounds like she's in a real pissy mood again. YES!!
Friday, March 22, 2013
Me (to Male Roommate): something something Berlin Wall something.
Male Roommate: So, like, what WAS the Berlin Wall? Was it, like, a pretty big deal?
Me: (explain Berlin Wall)
Male Roommate: So it was like, the Nazis?
Me: (explain the NSDAP, World War II, and the Cold War)
Male Roommate: So the south side was Germany and the north side was the USSR?
Me: ... Well, you know, it's not like I know how a computer works. (Ed.: Male Roommate is working on a certificate in network something or other.)
Male Roommate: No one really knows. It's a lot of ones and zeros. And AND gates and OR gates.
Me: Really? I thought they used NAND gates and NOR gates.
Male Roommate: Really?
Google: NAND gates and NOR gates.
Me: remember several historical events PLUS a computer science course I failed spectacularly in 1994. Modern 19-yo: can't remember his own major. Now tell me again how modern methods are making teaching more effective?
Male Roommate: So, like, what WAS the Berlin Wall? Was it, like, a pretty big deal?
Me: (explain Berlin Wall)
Male Roommate: So it was like, the Nazis?
Me: (explain the NSDAP, World War II, and the Cold War)
Male Roommate: So the south side was Germany and the north side was the USSR?
Me: ... Well, you know, it's not like I know how a computer works. (Ed.: Male Roommate is working on a certificate in network something or other.)
Male Roommate: No one really knows. It's a lot of ones and zeros. And AND gates and OR gates.
Me: Really? I thought they used NAND gates and NOR gates.
Male Roommate: Really?
Google: NAND gates and NOR gates.
Me: remember several historical events PLUS a computer science course I failed spectacularly in 1994. Modern 19-yo: can't remember his own major. Now tell me again how modern methods are making teaching more effective?
You know what I miss most from Hay River right now? The Highrise elevator. Where you can meet all sorts of different people and have a quick conversation a few times a day and then go on with your business, and every three or four days the handsome Elevator Mechanic is there to fix it. (Haha, just kidding! The elevator mechanic isn't handsome. Just looks that way cause we're always so happy to see him!)
I discovered an easy way to save money. It started when I emailed myself money because it's the fastest way to move it between my bank accounts, and then I was too lazy to get out my bank card and accept my own email transfer. So now it's not in either of my accounts. They'll hold it for up to a month... and meanwhile there is no way for me to spend it. Sweet!
Thursday, March 21, 2013
The good news is, there is now a tiny bit of play in my window. I've been prying the sash away from the jamb to break the caulk. If I can get the corners to break, and if the guy didn't put anything sticky in the pocket, I should be able to get it. If not, there's still the bottlejack.
Ioana: You are persistent, I'll give you that :))
Me: Yes. Most people WILL give me that, I think. Or else I NAG THEM UNTIL THEY DO. LOL
Ioana: You are persistent, I'll give you that :))
Me: Yes. Most people WILL give me that, I think. Or else I NAG THEM UNTIL THEY DO. LOL
I come home from walking the dog and see melting snow from the roof is dripping on the back stairs again, which will cause extremely unsafe conditions this evening when it freezes. So I look up to see where the water is dripping from, thinking I might put a bucket to catch the drip... and I discover there's no eavestrough. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...
I was thinking, I haven't had a dream about Slimey in a long time. And I'm having a hard time visualising The Handsome One anymore. And then I was thinking, tabarnak, I hope THEY still dream about me every day. It's not nearly as fun getting rid of them if they don't regret it for the rest of their lives.
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
My handsome pastor introduces me to everyone in the congregation as "this is Elise; she was confirmed at St. Peter's in Rome!" So today I was like: "yeah but you realise that means I was confirmed a Catholic, right? Cause they don't confirm Lutherans at St. Peter's." And everyone was like "hmmmmm... I see your point there..."
My voice teacher and I achieved a breakthrough, I think. See, singers, unlike epileptics, DO choke on their tongue. To avoid that, you have to bring your tongue forward but also down flat and relaxed. Which is hard to do. But now it seems I got it, and I can sing things that I was choking on two days ago. Downside: now I sing with a lisp from having my tongue between my teeth. But I'll fix that.
Then I came home and read some comments on my Facebook and I was reminded of the time when I was gonna dissolve some hardened egg off my car with an incredibly strong solution of TSP, and I forgot my solvent-resistant gloves in the house, and I was like "meh, I'll just do without." And then I went back and got my gloves, and used the TSP, and it turned the egg into soap... but not my fingers, a la Tyler Durden.
Doing what you're told: still the fastest way to learn shit and be successful.
Then I came home and read some comments on my Facebook and I was reminded of the time when I was gonna dissolve some hardened egg off my car with an incredibly strong solution of TSP, and I forgot my solvent-resistant gloves in the house, and I was like "meh, I'll just do without." And then I went back and got my gloves, and used the TSP, and it turned the egg into soap... but not my fingers, a la Tyler Durden.
Doing what you're told: still the fastest way to learn shit and be successful.
Exciting Winnipeg adventures: I hear the garbage truck coming! Quick! I'm finally gonna get to see it pick up the garbage carts with its robotic arm! Eeeeeeerrrr... WTF? It's just a dude walking behind the truck grabbing the garbage bags out of the cart with his hands. BOOHOOHOO I'M SO SAD! All the mystique of the Winnipeg robots is ruined! Maybe if I look behind the self-checkout computers at the library there's a little dude reading the bar codes through the scanner and writing things on a paper card with a quill. Sigh...
Deirdre: We actually have trucks that pick them up with robotic arms.
Me: Yeah, just rub it in...
Deirdre: We actually have trucks that pick them up with robotic arms.
Me: Yeah, just rub it in...
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
It's incredibly hot in my room and I still can't get the window open. I think I could drill two holes through the window frame, put rebar through them, run the other end of the rebar through a 4x4, and then rent a bottlejack and apply force to the bastard. Except that it doesn't sound like a very stable setup for the bottlejack.
Does everyone have friends that you like in real life but can't stand on Facebook because they post such lame, tedious, vapid stuff? Or is it just me?
Rob: Yeah, I just remove them from my news feed
Édith: Oh yeah. Je dois lui écrire une fois aux deux statuts de s'acheter un livre sur How to use Fb.
Me: Oh good. I thought I was just being a bitch.
Rob: Yeah, I just remove them from my news feed
Édith: Oh yeah. Je dois lui écrire une fois aux deux statuts de s'acheter un livre sur How to use Fb.
Me: Oh good. I thought I was just being a bitch.
There. According to Environment Canada's data for the last 10 years, this winter is 1.26 sigma colder than average, and 2.25 sigma more snow. 1.26 sigma is irrelevant; 2.25 sigma is somewhat relevant in that 95% of the time one would be 2 sigma and under. Which means an above-2-sigma outcome happens about once in 20 times. And half of those would be 2 sigma in the other direction. So a winter this cold or colder can be expected about once in ten years. Big Fucking Deal. Quit bitching and go take photos of your food.
(Later) I wrote the English explanation of the math too fast, clearly. It should say that a winter this cold or colder can be expected about once in five years (1.26 sigma), and a winter with two or more sigma of cold or snow, once in ten years. The actual probability for a winter with more snow based on the ten-year data is 2.4% or once in 41 years, which is slightly more interesting. However, as my previous study had shown, the distribution of snow is actually not Gaussian but one-tailed which means that any amount greater than (a number I haven't calculated yet) is about equally likely. I had only calculated the one-day figure which is 4", which is to say there is about a 1 in 90 chance to get more than 4" in one day (if memory serves), but the odds of getting one foot or two feet or three feet are all pretty much equal. And "1 in 90" is once every three months which would be twice per winter. Anyway I have been meaning to perform and write up a more detailed statistical analysis of snow and cold in Hay River, but I haven't got around to it. It will be on my political blog when/if I get her done.
(Later) I wrote the English explanation of the math too fast, clearly. It should say that a winter this cold or colder can be expected about once in five years (1.26 sigma), and a winter with two or more sigma of cold or snow, once in ten years. The actual probability for a winter with more snow based on the ten-year data is 2.4% or once in 41 years, which is slightly more interesting. However, as my previous study had shown, the distribution of snow is actually not Gaussian but one-tailed which means that any amount greater than (a number I haven't calculated yet) is about equally likely. I had only calculated the one-day figure which is 4", which is to say there is about a 1 in 90 chance to get more than 4" in one day (if memory serves), but the odds of getting one foot or two feet or three feet are all pretty much equal. And "1 in 90" is once every three months which would be twice per winter. Anyway I have been meaning to perform and write up a more detailed statistical analysis of snow and cold in Hay River, but I haven't got around to it. It will be on my political blog when/if I get her done.
Things I thought The Sprog might play with: My Little Ponies. Things his mother thought The Sprog might play with: some of his own toys. Things The Sprog actually played with: a piece of plastic wrap (yes I know plastic wrap kills babies but I was RIGHT THERE the whole time watching him) and a magical musical instrument that makes different sounds depending how you bang on it... also known as an empty cardboard box.
Deirdre: Try tupperware, spoons, pots... they all make great toys. Water in a bowl, bubbles in a sink...
Me: I think he's looking for things that he can investigate. For example: I grabbed the box of Kleenex to wipe his face; he then crawled after the box of Kleenex, grabbed it, pulled out dozens of Kleenex and tore them to shreds. Then he found paper and tried to tear it, but found it doesn't tear as easily as Kleenex. Then he found the plastic wrap and found that it doesn't tear either but it shines in the sun, it crinkles, you can put it in your mouth, and then when you shake it it makes a pretty shower of drool drops. Whereas My Little Pony is just a lame chunk of pink plastic.
Deirdre: Try tupperware, spoons, pots... they all make great toys. Water in a bowl, bubbles in a sink...
Me: I think he's looking for things that he can investigate. For example: I grabbed the box of Kleenex to wipe his face; he then crawled after the box of Kleenex, grabbed it, pulled out dozens of Kleenex and tore them to shreds. Then he found paper and tried to tear it, but found it doesn't tear as easily as Kleenex. Then he found the plastic wrap and found that it doesn't tear either but it shines in the sun, it crinkles, you can put it in your mouth, and then when you shake it it makes a pretty shower of drool drops. Whereas My Little Pony is just a lame chunk of pink plastic.
I was woken up at 23:17 by a loud noise the roommates made; but because I came out of a deep sleep, I don't know what the noise was. Then, I was woken up again at 23:54 by the male roommate wailing like Rachel for her children as he ran to the bathroom. I contemplated whether I should a) freak out and tell him to shut up, b) offer assistance, or c) ignore it. By the intensity of the wailing I hypothesised that either there was a death in his family, or the little bitch cut off his penis. Speaking of which, while her mate was crying his heart out in the bathroom, the worthless creature was talking unkindly to her poor dog in a nasty snake-like ice cold voice. Man, she's disgusting.
Strangely, however, the wailing stopped almost as abruptly as it started after only a few minutes. WTF??? You're crying to wake the dead in the middle of the night... and after four minutes you feel better? Shut up, you douche. I'm sorry I even considered offering assistance. You ugly slime.
Then he sniffled away, I think to sleep in his own bed (he's been increasingly not sleeping with the bitch), and I... spent the rest of the night trying to ignore my dog fussing. Because contrary to some dogs who know exactly what time it is, Her Majesty figures that once she wakes up, it's waking up time. So what if it's midnight? Time to get up and relocate to the living room... where she will sleep the rest of the day.
Sigh.
Strangely, however, the wailing stopped almost as abruptly as it started after only a few minutes. WTF??? You're crying to wake the dead in the middle of the night... and after four minutes you feel better? Shut up, you douche. I'm sorry I even considered offering assistance. You ugly slime.
Then he sniffled away, I think to sleep in his own bed (he's been increasingly not sleeping with the bitch), and I... spent the rest of the night trying to ignore my dog fussing. Because contrary to some dogs who know exactly what time it is, Her Majesty figures that once she wakes up, it's waking up time. So what if it's midnight? Time to get up and relocate to the living room... where she will sleep the rest of the day.
Sigh.
Monday, March 18, 2013
In order to sing like a BOSS, you have to raise the top half of your face, which requires tension, and drop the bottom half, which requires relaxation. This is hard to do and makes you look like an idiot, but it does make you sing like a BOSS. So that's what I'm working on in voice lessons. Today my voice teacher was telling me to visualize having a basketball in the back of my throat. WTF???? I'm pretty sure if I had a basketball in my throat I'd be heimliching myself, not trying to sing bel canto. So I told her what *I* visualize: that moment in The Grudge when a minor character has had her lower jaw ripped off and is walking around with a rather tense expression in the top half of her face and her tongue hanging down to her collarbones, for lack of a jaw to hold it up.
Brilliant, right?
Ha. Apparently, my voice teacher does not believe in visualizing horror movies while singing romantic arie. Oh yeah???? Well let me tell you something, missy. The ONLY WAY I'm ever gonna sing this maudlin Italian love song crap "with feeling" is by visualizing horror movies.
Seriously, I've actually had to decline one of her picks because it was just too horrible, even for a love song. Once she understands that I only do a) sacred and b) cynical, we'll get on just fine.
Dana: Your poor voice teacher.
Me: It's ok. I'm pretty sure she's too young to have seen The Grudge.
Dana: I'm pretty sure that I'm too 'something(?)' to have seen The Grudge so she and I are good without that visualization, thankyouverymuch. She so didn't know what she was getting into when she agreed to take you on, did she?
Me: No. No, she did not.
Brilliant, right?
Ha. Apparently, my voice teacher does not believe in visualizing horror movies while singing romantic arie. Oh yeah???? Well let me tell you something, missy. The ONLY WAY I'm ever gonna sing this maudlin Italian love song crap "with feeling" is by visualizing horror movies.
Seriously, I've actually had to decline one of her picks because it was just too horrible, even for a love song. Once she understands that I only do a) sacred and b) cynical, we'll get on just fine.
Dana: Your poor voice teacher.
Me: It's ok. I'm pretty sure she's too young to have seen The Grudge.
Dana: I'm pretty sure that I'm too 'something(?)' to have seen The Grudge so she and I are good without that visualization, thankyouverymuch. She so didn't know what she was getting into when she agreed to take you on, did she?
Me: No. No, she did not.
What Handel wrote: "I know that my Redeemer liveth and He shall stand at the latter day upon the earth." How it sounds at practice: "I know that my Redee, mer. Crap. I know that my Redee, mer. Crap. I know that my Redee, mer DAMNIT I know that my Redeemer liveth and he shall stan- fuck. I know that my Redeemer liveth, and he shall stan- FUCK. I know that my Redee, mer GODDAMNIT!"
0800: alarm goes off. Snooze it. 0804: phone rings. WTF? Who phones me? At 0804? Ignore it. 0805: alarm goes off. Snooze it. 0807: dog is fussing. Please shut up, dog. Dog shuts up. 0810: alarm goes off. Snooze it. 0812: strange noise in my ear. Open my eyes: dog is standing there NOT fussing or making noise... but with her nose so close to me it sounds like a tornado in my ear. 0815: alarm goes off. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH! Just for that I'm not getting up! Screw you all! 0943: wake up, look at the time. Damn, I have so much stuff to do today...
Sunday, March 17, 2013
You have a cold or ache? Poor you. When is your surgery? Oh you're not having any? Well then does the medication cause hair loss, vomiting, mouth sores, hearing loss, anemia or kidney damage? No? But you're gonna be in a wheelchair for the rest of your life, right? No??? Is there at least SOME chance that you might actually die from this? Not even? Wow. Then if you're looking for sympathy, I believe it's somewhere between "shit" and "syphilis." While you got the dictionary out just look up "grow up", too.
My upcoming concert schedule:
March 24 - St John Passion
March 30 - Requiem
April 6 - Monteverdi (+ church dance?)
April 13 - Aida
May 2 - Moulin Rouge (ballet)
May 5 - church musical
May 18 - RWB pro school concert
May 24 - another Camerata Nova concert
Hmmmmm.... WHY is there a 19-day gap in my entertainment? I don't find that acceptable.
March 24 - St John Passion
March 30 - Requiem
April 6 - Monteverdi (+ church dance?)
April 13 - Aida
May 2 - Moulin Rouge (ballet)
May 5 - church musical
May 18 - RWB pro school concert
May 24 - another Camerata Nova concert
Hmmmmm.... WHY is there a 19-day gap in my entertainment? I don't find that acceptable.
So I didn't get around to mentioning that my new job scheduled me for training on... Saturday 6 & Sunday 7 of April. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! You ugly bastards, WHY? Why do you think I applied to the NIGHT shift and not the weekend day shifts? Now I have to miss the following: 1) musical costumes and rehearsal, 2) church, 3) baby shower for couple at church (that I don't know from a hole in the ground but we're family now since we go to the same church), and 4) Vespers of 1610 by Monteverdi. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I hate you! I had bought the Sunday afternoon concert ticket because the Saturday evening conflicts with the Dancing with the Pastors fundraiser for which I also have a ticket. Boohoohoo I'm so sad! So, I just exchanged my Sunday concert ticket for a Saturday one. I'll have to miss the pastors dancing, I guess, but I can still go to the dance afterwards. I bet Lutheran dances are way more fun than regular.
Me, to guest speaker at church: So how did you get to go to Cameroon?
Guest speaker: I was on the synod committee... and then I was going to Cameroon.
Regular people: go out drinking, wake up in someone's bed and don't remember how you got there. Lutherans: join a church committee, turn up in Cameroon for four months and don't remember how you got there. Did I not tell you we know how to have fun?
Guest speaker: I was on the synod committee... and then I was going to Cameroon.
Regular people: go out drinking, wake up in someone's bed and don't remember how you got there. Lutherans: join a church committee, turn up in Cameroon for four months and don't remember how you got there. Did I not tell you we know how to have fun?
Saturday, March 16, 2013
There ya go. The incubation time for canine distemper is 14 to 18 days. Her vaccines were 16 days ago and it's the only thing she received that is consistent with the symptoms. But I thought vaccines were inactivated viruses and couldn't make you sick? Nope. The canine distemper vaccine has a live virus. The symptoms from the time she was in the hospital for a week are also consistent with distemper. And all the neurological symptoms she's been having since last summer would also be consistent with distemper. So, I'm gonna propose a hypothesis that she has a persistent canine distemper infection affecting the nervous system (a known condition documented in the Merck manual) and that it can be aggravated by exposure to more of the live virus. At least that's what I think.
Mardrey: That's rotten. Sorry to hear that. Does she have a Vet yet in Winnipeg?
Me: Yes she does, but the even worse news is, there is no treatment for canine distemper. You just manage the symptoms and hope they survive. Which is exactly what happened the last two times, it cost a fortune and I thought I was gonna lose her. So far her eye is actually looking better, just watery but no coloured discharge, and she doesn't feel like being held anymore. She only lets me hold her when she's feeling really rotten. As long as she's in good health she doesn't know me.
Mardrey: That's rotten. Sorry to hear that. Does she have a Vet yet in Winnipeg?
Me: Yes she does, but the even worse news is, there is no treatment for canine distemper. You just manage the symptoms and hope they survive. Which is exactly what happened the last two times, it cost a fortune and I thought I was gonna lose her. So far her eye is actually looking better, just watery but no coloured discharge, and she doesn't feel like being held anymore. She only lets me hold her when she's feeling really rotten. As long as she's in good health she doesn't know me.
At first when my dog got up in the middle of the night, jumped off the bed cleanly onto the landing mat, went to get herself a drink of water, jumped back on the bed from the mat, lay down beside me and went back to sleep without fussing, I thought she was finally starting to accept how things are in the new house. But now she has a whitish discharge from her right eye suggesting she's actually sick... and last time she had a discharge from her eye it cost over $400 in vet bills... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! Seriously dog, I can't pay a vet bill right now. For the love of God please don't get sick until April 2... then you can run up all the vet bills you want.
Ok, friends with serious child-rearing chops: I bought some My Little Ponies for The Sprog to suck on. Should I cut off the hair? It seems pretty securely attached.
Shannon: I wouldn't worry if it were for my kids.
Theresa: The hair should be fine - we haven't had any problems
Dana: I wouldn't worry either - course, Molly tried to drown twice at the pool this afternoon (and I'm all wet to prove it), so that may diminish the worth my child-rearing advice...
Me: Key word: "tried." Thanks ladies. I knew you'd have answers. :)
Shannon: I wouldn't worry if it were for my kids.
Theresa: The hair should be fine - we haven't had any problems
Dana: I wouldn't worry either - course, Molly tried to drown twice at the pool this afternoon (and I'm all wet to prove it), so that may diminish the worth my child-rearing advice...
Me: Key word: "tried." Thanks ladies. I knew you'd have answers. :)
Toys R Us is the best birth control ever. Millions of dollars in toys, dozens of kids freaking out because their parents aren't spending enough, and not one damn thing worth spending your hard-earned money. All I wanted was a solid bloc of plastic that the sprog can't choke on and I can wipe with Lysol when he's done... maybe I should just go to PetSmart and buy him a kong.
Theresa: Pet smart is actually a pretty good source for toddler chewable toys! I agree with you about toys r us - ugh.
Theresa: Pet smart is actually a pretty good source for toddler chewable toys! I agree with you about toys r us - ugh.
Friday, March 15, 2013
Things I thought might entertain a nine-month-old: watching smurfs on YouTube. Things that actually entertain a nine-month-old: eating dog hair; eating dog food; eating my wallet; eating my cellphone; eating the blinds' draw cord; eating the Kleenex when I wipe the drool off his face. Hmmmm... I need to get some physical smurfs for him to eat, I guess.
Vicki: Everything in the mouth
Me: I managed to keep the coffee out of his mouth. He even crawled across the room after it and stood up against the coffee table.
Vicki: I think 9 mons. is when I started sippy cups because they were interested in drinking from cups. He's putting everything in his mouth because he's cutting teeth. Atleast he's not crying
Me: Yeah I figured he was teething because I do hear him crying quite a bit. You can just see his first four teeth. But his mom only gives him to me when he's not crying. She's nice like that.
Vicki: Everything in the mouth
Me: I managed to keep the coffee out of his mouth. He even crawled across the room after it and stood up against the coffee table.
Vicki: I think 9 mons. is when I started sippy cups because they were interested in drinking from cups. He's putting everything in his mouth because he's cutting teeth. Atleast he's not crying
Me: Yeah I figured he was teething because I do hear him crying quite a bit. You can just see his first four teeth. But his mom only gives him to me when he's not crying. She's nice like that.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Went upstairs to my room for two things: 1) put my hair in a pony tail, b) ... can't remember... f'king headache I can't keep two things straight at the same time. Go back downstairs... F'king headache, man, I should take a pill or something. WOW NOW I REMEMBER WHAT I WENT UPSTAIRS FOR! Scumbag Brain.
Roommates: Thank you for cleaning the bathroom that we hadn't done in months. We greatly appreciate all this cleaning you've been doing.
Me: My pleasure.
Roommates: Naturally we will do the bathroom next time. Not more than a month from now.
Me: Of course! It doesn't need mentioning.
"Conversations that never happen in this house."
Me: My pleasure.
Roommates: Naturally we will do the bathroom next time. Not more than a month from now.
Me: Of course! It doesn't need mentioning.
"Conversations that never happen in this house."
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
I played a joke on my pastor at the Lenten service. When everybody goes around shaking hands and saying "peace be with you" I went up to him and said "السلام علیکم". Hahaha! We Lutherans are so fun-loving! It's a tenet of our religion, actually. Luther specifically said that we have to laugh a lot because laughing scares the devil away. (True story.)
Ok so before the pope interrupted what I was gonna say, I was gonna say, "another day, another hour of work trying to open my window." I've now removed enough material to see the extent of the damage. With the paint on it, it looked like the bottom of the window fell flush with the sill, but in fact it falls into a groove, meaning it will not be possible to leverage it from below. And also, I have to keep digging at it, because who knows how deep the groove is and so how much caulking is still holding the window down. Maybe it would be easier to just call a building inspector and be done with it... Am I right or am I right?
Haha! There's a seagull sitting on the chimney. I thought the Holy Spirit was supposed to show up as a dove, not a bird that eats garbage.
Mardrey and Nathalie like this.
Deirdre: The seagull has its own Twitter account already!
Me: I saw that. But it's not just one seagull, they take turns. I'm waiting to see something more fun like an ostrich or something.
Mardrey and Nathalie like this.
Deirdre: The seagull has its own Twitter account already!
Me: I saw that. But it's not just one seagull, they take turns. I'm waiting to see something more fun like an ostrich or something.
Pope cam! Watch the smoke happening LIVE! Booya! Exciting! And, there is still time to pick your favourite in my Pope Pool! (Ed.: Initially this post included a link to the Sistine Chapel chimney webcam.)
Deirdre: (12:43) I'm hoping they go with someone completely unexpected.
Me: (14:25) How about the Spanish Inquisition? Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.
Deirdre: Maybe too unexpected...
Me: (14:26) I'm still cheering for Oswald Gracias.
Deirdre: Too late - Jorge Bergoglio from Argentina.
Me: (simultaneously) Oh wait... they just announced him. I lose. But hey, an Argentine is good too. What kind of name is "Francis"? Is that after St. Francis of Assisi?
Deirdre: Possibly Francis Xavier, one of the first Jesuits.
Me: No, he'd have gone by Francis Xavier. Francis Xavier is always referred to as Francis Xavier. I know cause I went to a Jesuit school. I still celebrate St. Francis Xavier day every year on December 3.
Deirdre: Not sure then.
Me: Plus Francis Xavier would kinda freak out a lot of people. The Jesuits were pretty scary sometimes.
Deirdre: He is the first Jesuit Pope.
Me: All the more reason NOT to go with Francis Xavier. St. Francis of Assisi was a hugely important reformer of the church.
Deirdre: True. It will be interesting to hear the interpretations of his choice and if they will tell us his reasons.
Me: Well it's too bad it's over so soon. I was hoping for a three-year saga of wild plot twists.
Deirdre: I don't think the world has quite enough turmoil to lead to a 3 year saga. And not enough infighting between cardinals.
Me: But we'd get to see the baby seagulls grow up!
Deirdre: Interesting to see the roof removed....
Me: They wouldn't do that... Not now that there are spy satellites that could look down and leak what's being said.
Deirdre: True, they would have to find some other incentive to speed up the process.
Me: Turn some bedbugs loose in St. Martha's.
Now that I think about it, I was right about the Spanish Inquisition. Baaaaaahaha! I crack me up.
Me: (17:05) "Initially, there was media speculation of whether he meant to honor either the 12th-century St. Francis of Assisi, known for his simple lifestyle and dedication to the works of mercy, or St. Francis Xavier, a 16th-century Spanish Jesuit priest known for his efforts to evangelize, particularly in Asia; or both. Jesuit Fr. Federico Lombardi, the Vatican spokesman, said the new pope chose the name in honor of St. Francis of Assisi." I was right. :) I like being right. :)
Deirdre: (19:20) You were right.
Me: (20:42) Yeah. We were all talking about the new pope at our Lenten service today and my Lutheran peeps agree that St. Francis Xavier would have been a little scary. We're kinda thinking St. Francis of Assisi might bode well for ecumenical dialog, what with preaching to the animals and all... and everyone is very impressed that the new pope cooks his own meals and rides the bus to work. However, one member of the congregation wonders whether Benedict really stepped down or was... pushed. So anyway, we Lutherans like your new pope so far. Thanks be to God.
By the way did you know that there are Lutheran Franciscans?
Deirdre: (12:43) I'm hoping they go with someone completely unexpected.
Me: (14:25) How about the Spanish Inquisition? Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition.
Deirdre: Maybe too unexpected...
Me: (14:26) I'm still cheering for Oswald Gracias.
Deirdre: Too late - Jorge Bergoglio from Argentina.
Me: (simultaneously) Oh wait... they just announced him. I lose. But hey, an Argentine is good too. What kind of name is "Francis"? Is that after St. Francis of Assisi?
Deirdre: Possibly Francis Xavier, one of the first Jesuits.
Me: No, he'd have gone by Francis Xavier. Francis Xavier is always referred to as Francis Xavier. I know cause I went to a Jesuit school. I still celebrate St. Francis Xavier day every year on December 3.
Deirdre: Not sure then.
Me: Plus Francis Xavier would kinda freak out a lot of people. The Jesuits were pretty scary sometimes.
Deirdre: He is the first Jesuit Pope.
Me: All the more reason NOT to go with Francis Xavier. St. Francis of Assisi was a hugely important reformer of the church.
Deirdre: True. It will be interesting to hear the interpretations of his choice and if they will tell us his reasons.
Me: Well it's too bad it's over so soon. I was hoping for a three-year saga of wild plot twists.
Deirdre: I don't think the world has quite enough turmoil to lead to a 3 year saga. And not enough infighting between cardinals.
Me: But we'd get to see the baby seagulls grow up!
Deirdre: Interesting to see the roof removed....
Me: They wouldn't do that... Not now that there are spy satellites that could look down and leak what's being said.
Deirdre: True, they would have to find some other incentive to speed up the process.
Me: Turn some bedbugs loose in St. Martha's.
Now that I think about it, I was right about the Spanish Inquisition. Baaaaaahaha! I crack me up.
Me: (17:05) "Initially, there was media speculation of whether he meant to honor either the 12th-century St. Francis of Assisi, known for his simple lifestyle and dedication to the works of mercy, or St. Francis Xavier, a 16th-century Spanish Jesuit priest known for his efforts to evangelize, particularly in Asia; or both. Jesuit Fr. Federico Lombardi, the Vatican spokesman, said the new pope chose the name in honor of St. Francis of Assisi." I was right. :) I like being right. :)
Deirdre: (19:20) You were right.
Me: (20:42) Yeah. We were all talking about the new pope at our Lenten service today and my Lutheran peeps agree that St. Francis Xavier would have been a little scary. We're kinda thinking St. Francis of Assisi might bode well for ecumenical dialog, what with preaching to the animals and all... and everyone is very impressed that the new pope cooks his own meals and rides the bus to work. However, one member of the congregation wonders whether Benedict really stepped down or was... pushed. So anyway, we Lutherans like your new pope so far. Thanks be to God.
By the way did you know that there are Lutheran Franciscans?
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Later that day, I discover that Windows Update is also the program that keeps the antivirus up to date, and I can't disable one without the other. Well played, Microsoft. Well played.
Susan: Can't you set it to manually updates only? That is what I used to do when I had windows. Then I would pick and choose what to update...I hate windows...
Me: Technically it gives me that option. Realistically I don't trust it to update only what I said, seeing as this whole seven-hour fight started because it was already not updating only what I said.
Susan: Yes...I agree it doesn't always work as advertised...
Me: Understatement of the year... LOL
Susan: Can't you set it to manually updates only? That is what I used to do when I had windows. Then I would pick and choose what to update...I hate windows...
Me: Technically it gives me that option. Realistically I don't trust it to update only what I said, seeing as this whole seven-hour fight started because it was already not updating only what I said.
Susan: Yes...I agree it doesn't always work as advertised...
Me: Understatement of the year... LOL
True story: roommate goes to the bathroom. Toilet doesn't flush properly. A while later I go to the bathroom. There is toilet paper in the toilet but water level has gone down so I don't know it's plugged. I use toilet, flush it, water rises threateningly. Fuuuuuuuuuuuh... So I wait for it to drain slowly. While I'm in the bathroom waiting, roommate knocks on the door. "Someone in here," I says. "Ok," he says. I keep waiting. When water level is low enough, I plunge the toilet. It works. I flush again. It works. I wash my hands and exit the bathroom.
Immediately, roommate rushes in to use the bathroom. So... Would I be correct in assuming that he knew the toilet was plugged, and didn't know what to do about it, and was just dying to go but waited for me to "test the water" so to speak? And then seeing that I was able to flush successfully, went and used the toilet himself? Yes. This sounds like a plausible reconstruction of events.
I'm thinking they should have a class in junior high about things like "sweeping", "plunging toilets", "licensing your dog and picking up after it"... You know, the stuff most BUT NOT ALL parents teach their own kids...
Atta: Elise I think you should be a book writer especially on critics because you can prolong your conversation even on petty matters.
Me: LOL Thanks if I wrote a book I hope it would be about something interesting and not my roommates trying to flush the toilet... I'm actually trying to learn the entire history of the world and write it out in chronological order. If I succeed maybe I can publish it... but for Facebook purposes, it turns out people care way more about my roommates than about world history.
Immediately, roommate rushes in to use the bathroom. So... Would I be correct in assuming that he knew the toilet was plugged, and didn't know what to do about it, and was just dying to go but waited for me to "test the water" so to speak? And then seeing that I was able to flush successfully, went and used the toilet himself? Yes. This sounds like a plausible reconstruction of events.
I'm thinking they should have a class in junior high about things like "sweeping", "plunging toilets", "licensing your dog and picking up after it"... You know, the stuff most BUT NOT ALL parents teach their own kids...
Atta: Elise I think you should be a book writer especially on critics because you can prolong your conversation even on petty matters.
Me: LOL Thanks if I wrote a book I hope it would be about something interesting and not my roommates trying to flush the toilet... I'm actually trying to learn the entire history of the world and write it out in chronological order. If I succeed maybe I can publish it... but for Facebook purposes, it turns out people care way more about my roommates than about world history.
What I did today:
0800: got up, walked dog, ate breakfast
0830: tried to fix Windows problem
1100: showered (cause I'm polite and I wait for the roommates to be up before I go make noise in the bathroom)
1115: tried to fix Windows problem
1215: ate lunch, walked dog
1245: singing practice
1315: tried to fix Windows problem
1500: fixed Windows problem!
1501: watched Toddlers and Tiaras to decompress
1545: walked dog
1615: so tired... can't stay awake...
1620: better read some jokes online to keep myself awake
1800: walked dog, took garbage out, ate supper
1845: all my FB friends are home from work! Let's read some status updates!
Tell me again how computers were gonna revolutionise productivity?
0800: got up, walked dog, ate breakfast
0830: tried to fix Windows problem
1100: showered (cause I'm polite and I wait for the roommates to be up before I go make noise in the bathroom)
1115: tried to fix Windows problem
1215: ate lunch, walked dog
1245: singing practice
1315: tried to fix Windows problem
1500: fixed Windows problem!
1501: watched Toddlers and Tiaras to decompress
1545: walked dog
1615: so tired... can't stay awake...
1620: better read some jokes online to keep myself awake
1800: walked dog, took garbage out, ate supper
1845: all my FB friends are home from work! Let's read some status updates!
Tell me again how computers were gonna revolutionise productivity?
Fking thing reinstalled itself AGAIN as soon as the third System Restore was complete. I'm surprised no one has blown up Microsoft's headquarters yet.
Rob: I have used Firefox for years for browsing, never had any issues
Me: Yeah, I think I'm gonna switch. But the upside of IE (sort of) is that its failure alerts you to the fact that Windows has nefariously updated itself again.
Rob: I have used Firefox for years for browsing, never had any issues
Me: Yeah, I think I'm gonna switch. But the upside of IE (sort of) is that its failure alerts you to the fact that Windows has nefariously updated itself again.
Run system restore to remove the Windows update that interferes with my browser history: success. Immediately following success, Windows update reinstalls itself. What the fucka fucky fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And by the way this is after I've specifically told it never ever EVER to install Windows updates without my expressed permission.
And by the way this is after I've specifically told it never ever EVER to install Windows updates without my expressed permission.
Monday, March 11, 2013
Things I know how to say in Urdu: 1) السلام علیکم; 2) خدا حافظ; 3) پاکستان زندہ باد. I think I'm pretty much good to go. (And if you try to type English and Urdu in the same sentence Facebook can't figure out which way to write.)
Asad: You're all set, a hello, goodbye and long live Pakistan is all you need
Me: Maybe I should learn "would you like fries with that" so I can get a job at McDonald's.
Deirdre: 'where is the bathroom?' is always a good one
Asad: LOL
Me: And a few cricket terms so I can make conversation.
Asad: yeah that'll help. Cricket is like the only thing anyone has in common. Cricket and politics and the failing economy and infrastructure, normal topics for conversations with almost anyone. And the weather too.
Me: Just like Canada! Except cricket. Cricket isn't really big in Canada. I was hoping to try it this summer because because they do have teams in Winnipeg but they don't have a women's league. Whereas Pakistan totally has women's cricket. So who's sexist now, Canada?
I guess "Imran Khan" is a cricket term LOL. And politics. Works for everything! Anyone asks me about the weather I'll just say "Imran Khan."
Asad: hhahaahaha yeah well lets just hope if he comes into power he doesn't become a dictator
Me: Or get assassinated. :(
Asad: yeah, that would suck.
Me: Maybe he'd be an enlightened despot.
Asad: I think that's what Pakistan needs, a philosopher tyrant kind of leader. Good guys can't do anything for the country because the system is rotten from the top to the bottom. A despot can change things for the better, make the system work properly, and if he has good intentions behind them all.. I'm for it. But that's really improbable imo.. like they say, power corrupts.
Me: I think that's what the whole world needs. But I think it's not power that corrupts, it's the things you have to do to thwart your enemies.
Asad: yeah.. you have to come down to their level to defeat them, and that changes you.
Me: :(
Asad: You're all set, a hello, goodbye and long live Pakistan is all you need
Me: Maybe I should learn "would you like fries with that" so I can get a job at McDonald's.
Deirdre: 'where is the bathroom?' is always a good one
Asad: LOL
Me: And a few cricket terms so I can make conversation.
Asad: yeah that'll help. Cricket is like the only thing anyone has in common. Cricket and politics and the failing economy and infrastructure, normal topics for conversations with almost anyone. And the weather too.
Me: Just like Canada! Except cricket. Cricket isn't really big in Canada. I was hoping to try it this summer because because they do have teams in Winnipeg but they don't have a women's league. Whereas Pakistan totally has women's cricket. So who's sexist now, Canada?
I guess "Imran Khan" is a cricket term LOL. And politics. Works for everything! Anyone asks me about the weather I'll just say "Imran Khan."
Asad: hhahaahaha yeah well lets just hope if he comes into power he doesn't become a dictator
Me: Or get assassinated. :(
Asad: yeah, that would suck.
Me: Maybe he'd be an enlightened despot.
Asad: I think that's what Pakistan needs, a philosopher tyrant kind of leader. Good guys can't do anything for the country because the system is rotten from the top to the bottom. A despot can change things for the better, make the system work properly, and if he has good intentions behind them all.. I'm for it. But that's really improbable imo.. like they say, power corrupts.
Me: I think that's what the whole world needs. But I think it's not power that corrupts, it's the things you have to do to thwart your enemies.
Asad: yeah.. you have to come down to their level to defeat them, and that changes you.
Me: :(
For greater clarity, if I decided to move to Pakistan on my own, I would not need to convert to Islam, because Pakistan has freedom of religion and there are Lutherans there. I could totally keep on being a Lutheran. In fact, I think Luther and the Prophet (PBUH) would have had much in common theologically, but that's a question for another venue. Back to my point, I'd only need to convert to Islam if I wanted to marry a muslim. And maybe not even then. But with that being said, I don't remember ever suggesting that I was moving to Pakistan, now or later, so whoever came up with that idea, you're having distorted cognitions of type "mind-reading". True story.
Donna: You know Elise you can't spew out things and not expect a reaction...or a suggestion....or a query. You assume that you can go on and on about Pakistan and not have someone question you. No one actually expects you to move there.......but a comment or query in good fun is all it is. Or are you asking everyone to ignore you? Most people enjoy your posts..... don't shoot people down for trying to engage you. Ed. WTF is wrong with you??????
Me: I'm neither "spewing things out" about Pakistan nor "going on and on" about Pakistan. I'm sharing photos of Pakistan. Because they're beautiful. I'm also taking an interest in Pakistani politics because I think Pakistan is very important to the world order and they have a super important election coming up. And because I have Facebook friends there. And because they were one of the first three civilisations and have an amazing history. And because Imran Khan is hot. If I had been yattering over the US "elections" like half of Canada, nobody would have to "question" me about it so why is Pakistan a problem? And obviously I can have a perfectly normal conversation with Asad about it so maybe the problem is how your comments come across to me and not why I'm talking about Pakistan. I frequently find your tone abrasive.
When I was working on leaving Hay River, at first I thought I'd delete everyone on Facebook who even has anything to do with Hay River. Then at the last minute I changed my mind and started adding everyone I know from Hay River so I could keep in touch. Now I remember... I'm a' purge the crap out of them.
Donna: You know Elise you can't spew out things and not expect a reaction...or a suggestion....or a query. You assume that you can go on and on about Pakistan and not have someone question you. No one actually expects you to move there.......but a comment or query in good fun is all it is. Or are you asking everyone to ignore you? Most people enjoy your posts..... don't shoot people down for trying to engage you. Ed. WTF is wrong with you??????
Me: I'm neither "spewing things out" about Pakistan nor "going on and on" about Pakistan. I'm sharing photos of Pakistan. Because they're beautiful. I'm also taking an interest in Pakistani politics because I think Pakistan is very important to the world order and they have a super important election coming up. And because I have Facebook friends there. And because they were one of the first three civilisations and have an amazing history. And because Imran Khan is hot. If I had been yattering over the US "elections" like half of Canada, nobody would have to "question" me about it so why is Pakistan a problem? And obviously I can have a perfectly normal conversation with Asad about it so maybe the problem is how your comments come across to me and not why I'm talking about Pakistan. I frequently find your tone abrasive.
When I was working on leaving Hay River, at first I thought I'd delete everyone on Facebook who even has anything to do with Hay River. Then at the last minute I changed my mind and started adding everyone I know from Hay River so I could keep in touch. Now I remember... I'm a' purge the crap out of them.
I think the better question is not why am I so into Pakistan but why aren't YOU? Not specifically Pakistan but why aren't YOU fascinated by something outside of your own dull little world? Why is your Facebook feed all about you? The world is so much more fascinating than that blank space between your couch and your TV. Look outward and feed your brain.
Asad likes this.
Donna: I think you would be surprised at how many people are actually into learning about other cultures beliefs etc. Ed.: as long as it's not Pakistan and Islam, I guess.
Me: I'm actually much more surprised by how many aren't.
Asad likes this.
Donna: I think you would be surprised at how many people are actually into learning about other cultures beliefs etc. Ed.: as long as it's not Pakistan and Islam, I guess.
Me: I'm actually much more surprised by how many aren't.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Reading coverage of the upcoming conclave on al-Jazeera. Cause it's better than Canadian coverage. True story.
Donna: So when are you converting and moving to Pakistan? Ed.: I'm talking about reading coverage of the Roman Catholic church on a Qatari network; she's talking about me converting to Islam and moving to Pakistan. WTF?????? <--------- exactly why I left Hay River. Fucksakes.
Me: Probably when Winnipeg becomes as unstimulating as Hay River. <-------- deliberate diss at Hay River just to learn her
Donna: Anytime now! <------- hahaha very funny cause yeah Winnipeg is ever gonna stoop to Hay River's level... did I mention that's exactly why I left Hay River?
Me: Or when Imran Khan asks me. Both are probably equally probable. <-------- another deliberate diss at Hay River which you totally brought on yourself. #yousuckHayRiver
Donna: So when are you converting and moving to Pakistan? Ed.: I'm talking about reading coverage of the Roman Catholic church on a Qatari network; she's talking about me converting to Islam and moving to Pakistan. WTF?????? <--------- exactly why I left Hay River. Fucksakes.
Me: Probably when Winnipeg becomes as unstimulating as Hay River. <-------- deliberate diss at Hay River just to learn her
Donna: Anytime now! <------- hahaha very funny cause yeah Winnipeg is ever gonna stoop to Hay River's level... did I mention that's exactly why I left Hay River?
Me: Or when Imran Khan asks me. Both are probably equally probable. <-------- another deliberate diss at Hay River which you totally brought on yourself. #yousuckHayRiver
I learn something new every day. Today I learned that stores in Manitoba are required by law to close by 18:00 on Sundays. Hmmmmm... Had I known that, I might have gone out and bought some groceries after church. I guess I'll have to eat either supper or breakfast at McDonald's then...
Or I could fix quinoa for supper and breakfast and not be such an entitled first-worldian.
Or I could fix quinoa for supper and breakfast and not be such an entitled first-worldian.
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Friday, March 8, 2013
You know what tastes good with quinoa? Everything.
Donna: I agree... now about that third job interview. ..did it happen yet?
Me: Yeah, that was on Wednesday. As I suspected, it was just a question of discussing the conditions.
Donna: So are you still waiting to hear... or are you not interested after the conditions spiel?
Me: I accepted their offer. I start March 26.
Donna: Congrats....how was your concert last night?
Me: Thank you. Sleeping Beauty was awesome. I had completely forgotten that I had bought a super expensive seat as a present to myself. I was in the third row. I have never seen ballet that close up before. Amazing. I'm going their next production in May and to the ballet school's production. I just have to find out my actual work schedule first and then I'll buy the tickets. And I think for next year not only I'm getting season's tickets but I'm gonna get an even more expensive seat. Like, right in the middle of the front row. But I have to see how the hours work out at Home Depot. My job is supposed to be pretty regular hours, unlike front-line guys, but still there is no guarantee, so no budget until I see how it plays out. I might end up getting a second part-time job. Allah knows best.
I can always eat more quinoa and put my grocery savings towards ballet tickets, right?
Donna: One very good reason to leave Hay River. You can actually be in a position to even consider season tickets. Stock up on quinoa.... worth it!
Me: When people were aggravating me in Hay River telling me Winnipeg sucks and I'd come back, I said at one point "I'll think about it if I get bored during ballet." So at one point during the ballet I remembered that and I was like so... where are you now...See More
I wonder if Imran Khan is into ballet. LOL
Donna: I agree... now about that third job interview. ..did it happen yet?
Me: Yeah, that was on Wednesday. As I suspected, it was just a question of discussing the conditions.
Donna: So are you still waiting to hear... or are you not interested after the conditions spiel?
Me: I accepted their offer. I start March 26.
Donna: Congrats....how was your concert last night?
Me: Thank you. Sleeping Beauty was awesome. I had completely forgotten that I had bought a super expensive seat as a present to myself. I was in the third row. I have never seen ballet that close up before. Amazing. I'm going their next production in May and to the ballet school's production. I just have to find out my actual work schedule first and then I'll buy the tickets. And I think for next year not only I'm getting season's tickets but I'm gonna get an even more expensive seat. Like, right in the middle of the front row. But I have to see how the hours work out at Home Depot. My job is supposed to be pretty regular hours, unlike front-line guys, but still there is no guarantee, so no budget until I see how it plays out. I might end up getting a second part-time job. Allah knows best.
I can always eat more quinoa and put my grocery savings towards ballet tickets, right?
Donna: One very good reason to leave Hay River. You can actually be in a position to even consider season tickets. Stock up on quinoa.... worth it!
Me: When people were aggravating me in Hay River telling me Winnipeg sucks and I'd come back, I said at one point "I'll think about it if I get bored during ballet." So at one point during the ballet I remembered that and I was like so... where are you now...See More
I wonder if Imran Khan is into ballet. LOL
Female Roommate's brother came and picked up Fluffy. And Downstairs Roommate is out with Spencer and Baby. Often she spends the weekends at her parents. Now Her Majesty and I have the house all to ourselves! PARTY DOWN!
(Later.) Little bastard hit my car on his way out and didn't even mention it. What a family.
(Later.) Little bastard hit my car on his way out and didn't even mention it. What a family.
Male Roommate comes into the living room and informs me that both of them are gonna be away for the weekend and the girl's family is supposed to come by and pick up Fluffy, but "if no one comes get him can you look after him for the weekend?" Er... On the one hand, yes, I can certainly take care of a little dog for the weekend. On the other hand, do you feel at all like a douche that you won't let me walk him out of pettiness, but if you're desperate you'll let me? Oh well. If it gets you out of the house for two days, I'm happy to do you an easy favour.
Yesterday I came home from being out and found Spencer (Downstairs Roommate's dog) wandering the house by himself. And as I followed him to see what he was up to, I hear a strange little voice talking to me. So I looked for the source, and there was the baby sitting in his... exersaucer? I think that's what it's called. Anyway, Downstairs Roommate had to move her car off the street for snow removal, so she had left Spencer and Baby in the living room to entertain themselves. So I played witht the baby until she came back, which wasn't very long. So then I told her, if she needs him watched for short periods, I'd be happy to. (I can't babysit tiny ones for long periods cause I don't know how to entertain them.) So today, when she was going to take Spencer out, she gave me the baby. She was gone just a few minutes but it was nice having a baby all to myself for a few minutes. Thank you, Downstairs Roommate. :)
Tatelena, Suvi-Maarit, Donna, Dana, Jaeda and Deirdre like this.
Tatelena, Suvi-Maarit, Donna, Dana, Jaeda and Deirdre like this.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Hmmmm... Two more ballet performances I need to buy tickets for, and I don't go on the schedule at my new job until March 26 (due to payroll timing considerations). So... buy ticket nows and risk a scheduling conflict, or wait till I have a schedule and a paycheque and risk not getting as good a seat? First world problems.
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Dear roommates: I appreciate your enthusiasm for the toilet cleaner I bought (after you lived in this house without any cleaning products for three months). However, I should point out that it's not "scrub free". Don't just keep applying it and hoping stuff will disappear. You have to use THE BRUSH. True story.
I keep thinking I should take up a sport but they all look so tiring...
Deirdre: What happened to your skipping?
Me: I don't think it would go over in this house... and I have no idea where I packed my rope... and my room is too small anyway... I'm thinking more of a team sport with standards of performance and stuff.
Deirdre: Team sports are a great way of making sure you get out and active. I like running right now because it's more flexible time wise, location wise etc.
Me: I used to run a lot when I lived in Edmonton, but I'm much more drawn to things that have structure and cooperation these days. Probably a reaction against the excessive individualism up north.
Donna: Jazzercize Winnipeg.
Me: Meh. I'm thinking more like soccer. If only they had a walk-only soccer league so I wouldn't have to run.
Deirdre: Play goal.
Me: I doubt the team will let me... I have this thing about getting out of the way of fast-moving objects. Good for survival, not good for soccer.
Me: Rowing! There's no running involved in rowing.
Deirdre: Rowing works! Winnipeg has good sized rivers.
Me: I could be the coxswain. I like yelling at people.
Deirdre: What happened to your skipping?
Me: I don't think it would go over in this house... and I have no idea where I packed my rope... and my room is too small anyway... I'm thinking more of a team sport with standards of performance and stuff.
Deirdre: Team sports are a great way of making sure you get out and active. I like running right now because it's more flexible time wise, location wise etc.
Me: I used to run a lot when I lived in Edmonton, but I'm much more drawn to things that have structure and cooperation these days. Probably a reaction against the excessive individualism up north.
Donna: Jazzercize Winnipeg.
Me: Meh. I'm thinking more like soccer. If only they had a walk-only soccer league so I wouldn't have to run.
Deirdre: Play goal.
Me: I doubt the team will let me... I have this thing about getting out of the way of fast-moving objects. Good for survival, not good for soccer.
Me: Rowing! There's no running involved in rowing.
Deirdre: Rowing works! Winnipeg has good sized rivers.
Me: I could be the coxswain. I like yelling at people.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Tomorrow is the big day... my third interview with Home Depot. I'm hoping to drive over there, if the Fnord will get out of the giant snowbank that fell on it yesterday. Inshallah.
Donna: Good luck. Three interviews seems extreme. Are you applying for CEO or something?!
Me: You'd think so. Cause it's not JUST three interviews. There was first the resume and cover letter, then aptitude test, then phone interview, then two in-person interviews, then reference check and police record check, and now this. What I'm applying for is called "pack-out/pack-down" in their company culture and is their version of stocking and fronting. So... I don't get it. But if they hire me, I don't care how they go about it.
Donna: I would be stressed to the max going through all this. Making it this far must be a good sign. I would think many wouldn't get through all of this.
Me: Yeah, I'm thinking if they're still calling me after aptitude test, two interviews and reference check, this is probably more about discussing conditions than about still making up their mind about me. I hope so, at least. I'm not stressed, I just want the job so I can settle in a routine and get on with my fabulous life in the City of Dreams.
Mardrey: fingers X'd
Dana: a police record check to face circular saws??? wow - you all must have some crazy horror movies up there... LOL!
Me: Their excuse for wanting the PRC is that I'm applying for the night shift. I was not aware that criminals preferred night jobs... seems like they would want their nights free to get out there and do some crime.
Dana: LOL!!! crazy.
Donna: If you get that job you can sleep the day away with your female roomie! Not literally with!
Me: Yeah, I think it will be nice being out of the house during her most active times and going to bed when the house is quietest. And night shift doesn't interfere with any of my hobbies.
Donna: Good luck. Three interviews seems extreme. Are you applying for CEO or something?!
Me: You'd think so. Cause it's not JUST three interviews. There was first the resume and cover letter, then aptitude test, then phone interview, then two in-person interviews, then reference check and police record check, and now this. What I'm applying for is called "pack-out/pack-down" in their company culture and is their version of stocking and fronting. So... I don't get it. But if they hire me, I don't care how they go about it.
Donna: I would be stressed to the max going through all this. Making it this far must be a good sign. I would think many wouldn't get through all of this.
Me: Yeah, I'm thinking if they're still calling me after aptitude test, two interviews and reference check, this is probably more about discussing conditions than about still making up their mind about me. I hope so, at least. I'm not stressed, I just want the job so I can settle in a routine and get on with my fabulous life in the City of Dreams.
Mardrey: fingers X'd
Dana: a police record check to face circular saws??? wow - you all must have some crazy horror movies up there... LOL!
Me: Their excuse for wanting the PRC is that I'm applying for the night shift. I was not aware that criminals preferred night jobs... seems like they would want their nights free to get out there and do some crime.
Dana: LOL!!! crazy.
Donna: If you get that job you can sleep the day away with your female roomie! Not literally with!
Me: Yeah, I think it will be nice being out of the house during her most active times and going to bed when the house is quietest. And night shift doesn't interfere with any of my hobbies.
Something else that was inevitable: someone died in Hay River. Or more accurately, someone died and I know about it. Because worse than someone dying and you not being there, is when someone dies and you don't even find out about it because nobody thinks of telling you. I've always said Hay River should have some kind of bulletin board for births, deaths, and other such events. But mostly deaths. There's always time later to find out someone was born; not so much for paying your respects.
Selina: Totally agree ;)) it's hard to hear we lost one flock and hear it second hand , half the time your driving by and see a funeral with no word to attend ?;( I'm still bothered over hearing about bev a week after the fact;(
Édith: I really got along well with Bev and I didn't know she had passed away, a week before, when I called H&R Block for a mistake in my files. I felt terribly bad, a board would be kind of a necessity. My call would have waited, it is just a shame.
Me: Bev who? See, I didn't even hear about Bev. Even with my own HandiVan clients, I didn't always hear in time to go to the funeral. When people lose a loved one they don't go around informing everyone, it would be so much easier for someone to post it once and everyone knows.
Selina: Totally agree ;)) it's hard to hear we lost one flock and hear it second hand , half the time your driving by and see a funeral with no word to attend ?;( I'm still bothered over hearing about bev a week after the fact;(
Édith: I really got along well with Bev and I didn't know she had passed away, a week before, when I called H&R Block for a mistake in my files. I felt terribly bad, a board would be kind of a necessity. My call would have waited, it is just a shame.
Me: Bev who? See, I didn't even hear about Bev. Even with my own HandiVan clients, I didn't always hear in time to go to the funeral. When people lose a loved one they don't go around informing everyone, it would be so much easier for someone to post it once and everyone knows.
Monday, March 4, 2013
I had to take the bus halfway across town to the bookstore that sells the Bach and Monteverdi tickets, because I wasn't confident I'd get a ticket at the door. And in the bookstore, they also have fancy teas. One said "white ginger and pear." Oh? That sounds tasty. In theory I'm allergic to pears but I've eaten them lots of time, I don't think that's true. So I buy the tea. Come home, make a cup, and... now my throat is burning. Well imagine that... I really AM allergic to pears. (I really am! The doctor says so.)
Upcoming events:
March 6: yet another interview with Home Depot
March 7: Sleeping Beauty ballet
March 24: Bach's St. John Passion
March 30: Mozart's Requiem
March 31: Easter
April 6: Dancing with the Pastors
April 7: Monteverdi's Vespers of 1610 (or something - I'm not familiar with the work)
April 13, 16 or 19: Aida (reduced price thanks to my voice teacher who's in the chorus)
May 4: Church musical (not sure of the date but anyway I'm in the chorus)
If I'm this busy after a month, what is next year gonna look like when I'm working and in ballet and choir? I think I'll be living on Red Bull by then.
March 6: yet another interview with Home Depot
March 7: Sleeping Beauty ballet
March 24: Bach's St. John Passion
March 30: Mozart's Requiem
March 31: Easter
April 6: Dancing with the Pastors
April 7: Monteverdi's Vespers of 1610 (or something - I'm not familiar with the work)
April 13, 16 or 19: Aida (reduced price thanks to my voice teacher who's in the chorus)
May 4: Church musical (not sure of the date but anyway I'm in the chorus)
If I'm this busy after a month, what is next year gonna look like when I'm working and in ballet and choir? I think I'll be living on Red Bull by then.
Despite my bitchiness on Facebook, I've been trying to take a conciliatory, or at least a non-inflammatory, approach with the roommates. Even though I still want to put the little bitch's head through the drywall. Anyway. Every time she comes home from being out, her poor dog greets her with joy, and she yells at him. But he keeps doing it, because dogs are better people than people. Today she was in the kitchen when I came home from conservatory. The dog came up to me, and I greeted him happily while she bitched him out. Then I went and let MY dog out of our room, and she greeted me with delirious joy. Cause I was gone about 5 hours. So we're on the living room floor laughing and cuddling, and I'm calling her all kinds of ridiculous pet names, and so on. For quite a long time. And finally... the nasty little roommate picked up her dog and hugged him and called him something nice. Modelling positive behaviour for children... actually works sometimes. Thank you, Lord. That little dog so needed a hug.
A cement truck rolls past the house toward the construction site at the end of the street that started February 19, is fully fenced, and has not disturbed anyone in the neighbourhood through noise, swearing or other rudeness. They're already concreting?? Wow. This isn't your dinky Arcan project management, yo.
Our best friend in the house so far is Spencer, Downstairs' Roommate's two-year-old Jack Russel. He's cute but very hyper and has a tendency to piddle when excited. And he's always excited. So my approach with him is to be very mellow. More so than with the average dog. We don't see him much because downstairs is a self-contained suite, but every time he goes in and out with his person, he runs over to the living room door, looks at me, and then runs back to his person. I didn't think anything of it. Then yesterday, they came home from spending the weekend at her dad's when I was already upstairs reading in bed. So I heard Spencer galloping to the living room, and then a pause, and then he ran upstairs (he's not supposed to), came right to our door, sniffed at the door a little, and ran back down to his person. Aaaaawwwwwwwww... He likes us! Thank you, little dog. As long as dogs love me, people can say anything they want, I still know I'm a decent person.
I'm starting to feel bad-tempered. I'm sick and I know I have a huge bottle of ibuprofen in my room, but I can't find it cause the place is a mess. And it would be much easier to find things if I finished unpacking, but I rather don't want to do that until I decide whether I'm actually gonna stay in this house. And I don't want to walk to the corner store because there is white stuff on the ground that makes my feet cold. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! This is all your fault, Monday, you filthy bitch!
Another little step in getting settled here in Manitoba: find a pharmacy, have them call Hay River and transfer my prescriptions.
Pharmacy dude: So where are we transferring them from?
Me: Ring's Pharmacy, Hay River, Northwest Territories.
Pharmacy: North-west-ter-ri-to-ies? Well that's a first.
Me: Oh?
Pharmacy: It's like, in Yellowknife, right?
Me: No, Yellowknife is the capital, and Hay River is 480 km away on the other side of the big lake.
Pharmacy: (totally loses interest) So what's the phone number?
Pharmacy dude: So where are we transferring them from?
Me: Ring's Pharmacy, Hay River, Northwest Territories.
Pharmacy: North-west-ter-ri-to-ies? Well that's a first.
Me: Oh?
Pharmacy: It's like, in Yellowknife, right?
Me: No, Yellowknife is the capital, and Hay River is 480 km away on the other side of the big lake.
Pharmacy: (totally loses interest) So what's the phone number?
Sunday, March 3, 2013
As I was riding on the bus to church this morning, I noticed a sign that said "Mozart Requiem 30 March." Note to self: check that out. So I go online and there are... 32 tickets available. What? What's the seating capacity, 38? 2305? You're telling me this show is 98.6% sold out four weeks ahead of time? What's with all these classical concerts being sold out? Since when is classical music so popular?
Mardrey: Maybe it's because it's Good Friday the day before?
Me: I checked the orchestra's other concerts out of curiosity, they're all pretty much that bad. And Elijah was sold out. I was planning to see Bach's St. John Passion on the 24th but I'm starting to think I might not even get a ticket for that. There's no way to buy them online so I'll have to call tomorrow and find out.
Mardrey: Ah. Good luck
Me: Thanks.
Mardrey: Maybe it's because it's Good Friday the day before?
Me: I checked the orchestra's other concerts out of curiosity, they're all pretty much that bad. And Elijah was sold out. I was planning to see Bach's St. John Passion on the 24th but I'm starting to think I might not even get a ticket for that. There's no way to buy them online so I'll have to call tomorrow and find out.
Mardrey: Ah. Good luck
Me: Thanks.
Signs that my church is cool: 1) I can send my pastor an email with the title "Allah knows best". 2) As a fundraiser, the synod is putting on "Dancing with the Pastors". It's like "Dancing with the Stars" except local pastors will be dancing instead of celebrities. Baahaha! I can't wait to see that.
So here is what my handsome pastor had to say about the question of whether it's ok to ask a Muslim guy for coffee if he has fewer than four wives.
1) It's very unlikely that YOU would be asking him out for coffee. You have to get HIM to ask you.
2) A modern interpretation of the Quran holds that while it does allow a man to have four wives, it also says that he has to love them all equally, and since that's not actually possible, in reality the Quran DOESN'T allow a man to have four wives. But that's a modern interpretation.
3) That's an interesting question. You don't get asked that very often. Let me know what your friends have to say to that.
So there you go, Donna, now you have to respond to that. :)
I think he forgot to say "Allah knows best."
Donna: My question was really not based on a Muslim mans perspective ....but on whether you as a Christian female can date a married man who is not separated because HIS faith sanctions multiple marriages? I only challenge you because I thunk that the Christian faith....including those darn Lutherans would say no! Thanks for the post Elise. It was interesting to hear a modern interpretation on multiple marriages.
Me: I'm not aware that Christ forbade polygyny.
Donna: Maybe he didn't.......OK....next conversation with your pastor!
Me: I don't need to ask my pastor's opinion on this. As Lutherans we're all equal and I can read the Bible as well as he can. It makes sense to ask him about the Quran because he has studied it and I haven't.
Besides, in order to marry a Muslim man I'd have to become a Muslim myself so the opinion of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada would not be sought regarding our marriage.
Karen: Or the Muslim man would have to become a Lutheran. Interesting discussion
Me: But if he becomes a Lutheran he will no longer be allowed to have more than one wife, so that doesn't help me any. Unless the Lutheran church in Pakistan (if there is such a thing) consecrates plural marriages.
By the way it boggles MY mind that gay marriage is legal but polygamy isn't.
1) It's very unlikely that YOU would be asking him out for coffee. You have to get HIM to ask you.
2) A modern interpretation of the Quran holds that while it does allow a man to have four wives, it also says that he has to love them all equally, and since that's not actually possible, in reality the Quran DOESN'T allow a man to have four wives. But that's a modern interpretation.
3) That's an interesting question. You don't get asked that very often. Let me know what your friends have to say to that.
So there you go, Donna, now you have to respond to that. :)
I think he forgot to say "Allah knows best."
Donna: My question was really not based on a Muslim mans perspective ....but on whether you as a Christian female can date a married man who is not separated because HIS faith sanctions multiple marriages? I only challenge you because I thunk that the Christian faith....including those darn Lutherans would say no! Thanks for the post Elise. It was interesting to hear a modern interpretation on multiple marriages.
Me: I'm not aware that Christ forbade polygyny.
Donna: Maybe he didn't.......OK....next conversation with your pastor!
Me: I don't need to ask my pastor's opinion on this. As Lutherans we're all equal and I can read the Bible as well as he can. It makes sense to ask him about the Quran because he has studied it and I haven't.
Besides, in order to marry a Muslim man I'd have to become a Muslim myself so the opinion of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada would not be sought regarding our marriage.
Karen: Or the Muslim man would have to become a Lutheran. Interesting discussion
Me: But if he becomes a Lutheran he will no longer be allowed to have more than one wife, so that doesn't help me any. Unless the Lutheran church in Pakistan (if there is such a thing) consecrates plural marriages.
By the way it boggles MY mind that gay marriage is legal but polygamy isn't.
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Science:1 - Winnipeg: 0
I may have mentioned that I don't live in the "good" areas of Winnipeg. Because I don't have that kind of money, and the run-down parts have way better bus service. Plus you can say what you will about Winnipeg being "rough", but so far the bad parts of Winnipeg are still more civilised than the Highrise.
Ok, so this afternoon, as I'm spending a quiet Saturday afternoon doing nothing, Downstairs Roommate's father comes to pick her up. Initially he didn't seem to like me very much because... something about my dog. But now that I don't like the Upstairs Roommates and I think the landlady is doing a lousy job, he likes me. Great minds, all that. Anyway so he says to me "is that your van out back?" and I says yes and he says "somebody egged it. It's all over your windshield."
What????? But why?? Oh, wait. We're not in Hay River anymore. In Hay River, people vandalise your car because it's your car and they hate you. In Winnipeg, people vandalise your car because it's there. It's not personal. Phew! I feel better. "Egg comes off", I said, and I went about my day.
Later that day, though, I started thinking that the responsible thing to do would be to wash off the egg promptly. And I haven't used the car since... I don't even remember, so who knows how long that egg might have been sitting there hardening?
So... What's the best way to get hardened egg off my car? He said it's on the windshield, so if all else fails, I can use a razor blade, but why do it the hard way if I can think my way out of it? Ok. So, Google, tell me how to get egg off?
Hmmmmmmm... Initially, Google was not encouraging. "Egg will never come off and it will eat all the paint on your car and then kill you in your sleep." Really? That sounds a bit harsh. So how do I get it off? A low concentration of... vinegar? What? No, that just doesn't sound right. Plus I don't have any vinegar, so no.
Here is the thing: I want to dissolve the egg. So I don't have to do any work. So I google "what dissolves egg?" Ah-HA! Much better. Now I get a guy telling me vinegar won't work because it's an acid (that's what I just said! except about the acid); what you need is a strong base. Such as his proprietary formula! Yay!
Ok, but here is the thing: I'm not gonna go out and buy stuff. Don't want to. I think I've made it very clear that I don't want to do any work about this. So you know what, I have TSP. That's pretty much the only cleaner I have, so I'm gonna be using TSP. End of story.
Google, Google on the wall, tell me if TSP is a strong base?
Google: HELLS' YEAH!
Ok, actually it was Wikipedia. According to Wikipedia, "the pH of a 1% solution is 12, and the solution is sufficiently alkaline to saponify grease and oils." Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey! We're in business. So I read the back of the box and mix it according to the manufacturer's directions for what they call "ultra heavy duty". And then I had some soft rags, and naturally I own solvent-resistant gloves. Away I go, therefore, to de-egg my car.
Hmmmmm... Bad news: some of the egg is on the hood, and some on the roof. And you can't scratch the painted surfaces, obviously. Zut alors!
Oh well.
I dipped the soft rag into the TSP solution and dabbed at the rock-solid egg. And lo, immediately it began to dissolve! Well yeah, that was exactly the plan. Now some of the globs of egg were thicker than others, and the white is more resistant than the yoke, so a little elbow grease did get applied here and there, but to be honest the greatest challenge was simply reaching. The Fnord is not a small car and it's not that easy for me to reach the roof. Especially when I'm handling a caustic solution that I deliberately mixed strong enough to eat flesh. Plus it was very windy, and solvent-resistant gloves make your hands very, very cold, so I was getting in a hurry to get done. So I didn't entirely finish the windshield because it was too much trouble to reach and scrub. As long as I can see, I can drive, and I'll take the razor to it when it's nice out. I just poured the last of the solution on the windshield and use the wipers to spread it.
Now the one thing that was a little alarming was that it formed a foamy slime that coated everything and congealed as soon as I stopped wiping. Hmmmmmm... This does not bode well, I thought. But then I remembered, I mixed this solution "sufficiently alkaline to saponify grease." So you know what this foamy slime is? It's actually... soap suds. I kid you not! The TSP is saponising before my very eyes! My car is now covered no longer in egg, but in soap! That's insane.
So then I went to the carwash. The automatic wash, because I don't have any coins for the coin wash. Of course there's a line, and I'm sitting in the line looking at the stuff that I didn't get off the windshield thinking oh well, I'll get it later. But then when I got in the carwash and the water started, it... rinsed right off. Because of course all this time the TSP kept on eating at the egg, so by the time we got through the line, everything was dissolved. All the egg, and all the foamy slime, and everything simply washed away at the first application of water.
Hahaha that was AWESOME! Technically, getting your car egged is supposed to be terribly upsetting, cost you a fortune, and technically, it makes you a victim of a crime. No, really. Mischief against property. It's a summary, but still. And here I had a grand old time turning the egg into soap. Nice try, vandals. Next time, may I suggest egging Upstairs Roommates' car? Because they don't know how to get egg off and it will be a considerable nuisance to them, so it's much more worth your time. (That being said, I don't rule out the little bitch as perpetrator.)
So, the moral of all this is: SCIENCE WORKS, BITCHES!
Ok, so this afternoon, as I'm spending a quiet Saturday afternoon doing nothing, Downstairs Roommate's father comes to pick her up. Initially he didn't seem to like me very much because... something about my dog. But now that I don't like the Upstairs Roommates and I think the landlady is doing a lousy job, he likes me. Great minds, all that. Anyway so he says to me "is that your van out back?" and I says yes and he says "somebody egged it. It's all over your windshield."
What????? But why?? Oh, wait. We're not in Hay River anymore. In Hay River, people vandalise your car because it's your car and they hate you. In Winnipeg, people vandalise your car because it's there. It's not personal. Phew! I feel better. "Egg comes off", I said, and I went about my day.
Later that day, though, I started thinking that the responsible thing to do would be to wash off the egg promptly. And I haven't used the car since... I don't even remember, so who knows how long that egg might have been sitting there hardening?
So... What's the best way to get hardened egg off my car? He said it's on the windshield, so if all else fails, I can use a razor blade, but why do it the hard way if I can think my way out of it? Ok. So, Google, tell me how to get egg off?
Hmmmmmmm... Initially, Google was not encouraging. "Egg will never come off and it will eat all the paint on your car and then kill you in your sleep." Really? That sounds a bit harsh. So how do I get it off? A low concentration of... vinegar? What? No, that just doesn't sound right. Plus I don't have any vinegar, so no.
Here is the thing: I want to dissolve the egg. So I don't have to do any work. So I google "what dissolves egg?" Ah-HA! Much better. Now I get a guy telling me vinegar won't work because it's an acid (that's what I just said! except about the acid); what you need is a strong base. Such as his proprietary formula! Yay!
Ok, but here is the thing: I'm not gonna go out and buy stuff. Don't want to. I think I've made it very clear that I don't want to do any work about this. So you know what, I have TSP. That's pretty much the only cleaner I have, so I'm gonna be using TSP. End of story.
Google, Google on the wall, tell me if TSP is a strong base?
Google: HELLS' YEAH!
Ok, actually it was Wikipedia. According to Wikipedia, "the pH of a 1% solution is 12, and the solution is sufficiently alkaline to saponify grease and oils." Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey! We're in business. So I read the back of the box and mix it according to the manufacturer's directions for what they call "ultra heavy duty". And then I had some soft rags, and naturally I own solvent-resistant gloves. Away I go, therefore, to de-egg my car.
Hmmmmm... Bad news: some of the egg is on the hood, and some on the roof. And you can't scratch the painted surfaces, obviously. Zut alors!
Oh well.
I dipped the soft rag into the TSP solution and dabbed at the rock-solid egg. And lo, immediately it began to dissolve! Well yeah, that was exactly the plan. Now some of the globs of egg were thicker than others, and the white is more resistant than the yoke, so a little elbow grease did get applied here and there, but to be honest the greatest challenge was simply reaching. The Fnord is not a small car and it's not that easy for me to reach the roof. Especially when I'm handling a caustic solution that I deliberately mixed strong enough to eat flesh. Plus it was very windy, and solvent-resistant gloves make your hands very, very cold, so I was getting in a hurry to get done. So I didn't entirely finish the windshield because it was too much trouble to reach and scrub. As long as I can see, I can drive, and I'll take the razor to it when it's nice out. I just poured the last of the solution on the windshield and use the wipers to spread it.
Now the one thing that was a little alarming was that it formed a foamy slime that coated everything and congealed as soon as I stopped wiping. Hmmmmmm... This does not bode well, I thought. But then I remembered, I mixed this solution "sufficiently alkaline to saponify grease." So you know what this foamy slime is? It's actually... soap suds. I kid you not! The TSP is saponising before my very eyes! My car is now covered no longer in egg, but in soap! That's insane.
So then I went to the carwash. The automatic wash, because I don't have any coins for the coin wash. Of course there's a line, and I'm sitting in the line looking at the stuff that I didn't get off the windshield thinking oh well, I'll get it later. But then when I got in the carwash and the water started, it... rinsed right off. Because of course all this time the TSP kept on eating at the egg, so by the time we got through the line, everything was dissolved. All the egg, and all the foamy slime, and everything simply washed away at the first application of water.
Hahaha that was AWESOME! Technically, getting your car egged is supposed to be terribly upsetting, cost you a fortune, and technically, it makes you a victim of a crime. No, really. Mischief against property. It's a summary, but still. And here I had a grand old time turning the egg into soap. Nice try, vandals. Next time, may I suggest egging Upstairs Roommates' car? Because they don't know how to get egg off and it will be a considerable nuisance to them, so it's much more worth your time. (That being said, I don't rule out the little bitch as perpetrator.)
So, the moral of all this is: SCIENCE WORKS, BITCHES!
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