Later that day, I discover that Windows Update is also the program that keeps the antivirus up to date, and I can't disable one without the other. Well played, Microsoft. Well played.

Susan: Can't you set it to manually updates only? That is what I used to do when I had windows. Then I would pick and choose what to update...I hate windows...

Me: Technically it gives me that option. Realistically I don't trust it to update only what I said, seeing as this whole seven-hour fight started because it was already not updating only what I said.

Susan: Yes...I agree it doesn't always work as advertised...

Me: Understatement of the year... LOL